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Joke o the day
Murf,
I knew you would come up with a unique idea for your new custom implements business! Yup ooouuuuucchhh!!!
Dennis
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Joke o the day
Posted by Murf in another thread:
"Kinda reminds me of the joke about the elderly fella, good Christian, worked hard at farming his whole life, never made much money, not hardly enough to retire but too busted up and long in the tooth to keep farming. Decides to go to church every day and spends hours praying every single day, always the same thing .... "Dear Lord, I'm a good Christian down on my luck, could you find it in your Grace to send a winning lottery ticket my way?"
After months of this the old-timer stops on the steps of the church, looks up and says "Lord, why won't you give me a winning lottery ticket?"
The clouds part, a small beam of light appears shining directly on the old man and a voice from above asks "Where do you buy your lottery tickets?"
Astounded and in awe of this the man is barely able to utter "I... I...... I don't buy lottery tickets."
To which the voice from above replies "you dont buy tickets!? I don't mind 'helping' a little, but do you think you can at least work with me a little bit here?"
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Joke o the day
This one is from the daughters college orientation.
A business manager is looking for a administrative assistant and puts a poster in the window of his office. He lists the three job requirements on the poster. First the applicant must be able to type more than 90 words per minute, second they must be able to write programs, third they must be bi lingual.
Several weeks go by and he gets no applicants that meet the requirements.
Then one day a large dog of undetermined breed comes through the entrance, picks up the sign and walks up to the hiring manager's desk.
The manager says to the dog are you applying for the job?
The dog says woof! and then goes over and starts typing with his paws and nose 160 wpm. The manager asks him if he can program, the dog says woof! Pulls a USB flash drive from his collar plugs it in and programs some slick Excel macros for an inventory control system. The manager is very impressed but knows he will fail the third requirement. So he asks are you bilingual? The dog replies http://www.catchannel.com/ringtones/cats_meow.mp3
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10-03-2003, 21:22 
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